Dear Readers,
Sometimes when I'm watching TV or reading I come across an error that can only be categorized as "Just Plain Wrong." I am astounded by such blunders and this month I will share some with you.
Example: During the Ice Dancing finals of the 2014 Sochi Winter Olympics, Meryl Davis and Charlie White were dancing to the music of "Scheherazade." Tracy Wilson, one of the commentators, explains the story: Scheherazade spins such beguiling tales that the Persian king "spares her her life." *I believe that she simply meant to say that "he spared her life." One does not spare something to someone.
Example: On "The Finale Part I" of TV's "Seinfeld," Jerry, George, Elaine and Kramer are offered the use of NBC's private jet to go wherever they want. Elaine suggests Switzerland. Kramer says,
"Ooh, Switzerland, the Von Trapp family." *Wrong. They were from Austria.
Example: In the episode "Out of the Past" on the TV show "Motive," Vancouver detectives Flynn and Vega arrive at a small convenience store which is the scene of a crime. Flynn asks, "Didn't this used to be a doughnut joint?" Vega answers, "No, they closed that place." *In that case he should have said, "Yes [it used to be a doughnut joint], but they closed that place." Just wrong.
Example: I have to wonder about the writers on "Elementary" because I found two blunders.
#1: In the episode "Ancient History," Sherlock Holmes and Joan Watson are questioning a person of interest in a case they are investigating. Holmes tells the guy, "Why don't you go and get a piece of pen and paper so you can make some notes . . ." *Seriously, no one caught this mistake?
#2: In the episode "You do it to Yourself," while consulting on a murder investigation that involves Chinese gambling in New York City, Sherlock sees a few mah jong tiles and says, "Those are different sizes, they're different colors. They're clearly from different sets. Now mah jong tiles come in pairs. Why would he hold onto one of each?" *Just wrong. Mah jong tiles do not come in pairs. There are four of each suit plus eight jokers and eight flowers. If writers are going to use esoteric information, they should really check their facts.
Example: Barbara Corcoran, one of the sharks on "Shark Tank," tries to get a handle on pitchman Aviv's offer. She says, "I just want to clear the deck a little bit here." *I think she meant to say,
"Clear the air." Wrong expression.
Example: I read on the May 20, 2014 TV Guide magazine cover, "60 Greatest Comedies of All Time! Who's #1?" *The "who" in the question referred to a person and the answer was Lucy. But Lucy was not a comedy, she was a comedienne and a person.
Example: Stephen King, in his novel Under the Dome, wrote this: "For the first time since he'd taken the keys to the green Chief's car . . ." *Is the Chief green or is the car green, Mr. King?
Example: In The Suspect by John Lescroart, Assistant D.A. Gerry Abrams and San Francisco detective Devin Juhle are discussing an upcoming trial of a man accused of killing his girlfriend's five-month old son. Abrams says, "Shook him, did he?" Juhle responds, "He didn't really shake him. He just picked the kid up, trying to quiet it down, and then he just stopped breathing."
*Even detectives know that a child is not an it, but maybe the author was unsure. Also, in that same sentence, who exactly stopped breathing? The guy or the baby? Hmmm. . .
Example: The narrator and heroine, Anastasia Steele of Fifty Shades of Grey by E. L. James, talks about greeting her wealthy roommate's parents after her graduation ceremony. "We exchange brief pleasantries, mostly about their up and coming vacation to Barbados . . ." *I believe she meant to say "upcoming."
Example: Surprisingly, I found three major mistakes in Rhonda Pollero's book Knock 'Em Dead.
#1: Her heroine, Finley Tanner, says, "Even employed I couldn't afford Payton original unless I saved and scraped. Two S adjectives I've managed to avoid for almost thirty years." *Nope, Ms. Pollero, those S words are verbs, not adjectives.
#2: Finley is talking about having had sex with her boyfriend. She says, "I faked it. Sleepless in Seattle deli scene faked it." *Nope. That scene was from the movie "When Harry met Sally."
#3: Again, Finley says, "Deciding between a simple gold chain, no accessories at all, or a chunky beaded choker ate up another ten minutes. Okay, so I knew I wasn't going to put on anything but thin hoop earrings about five seconds after opening my jewelry drawer. The rest of the nine minutes and fifty-nine seconds was just me stalling." *Math anyone? If it took five seconds to decide and she had a window of ten minutes that would leave nine minutes and fifty-five seconds, wouldn't it?
Here are two more examples of problematic math:
Example: In the film version of "Confessions of a Shopaholic," titular character Rebecca Bloomwood is very much in debt. Her roommate Suze is trying to support and help her. Suze asks, "How are you going to pay off sixteen thousand twelve hundred and sixty-two dollars and seventy cents?" *OK, let's put this into figures: $16, 1262.70. I wish I had that much money.
Example: Kristof of Kristef Brothers balancing act on "America's Got Talent," talks about the hardships of performing. He says, "Financially it's been tough. I have a four month-year-old son. I'm here today to give a better future for him." *Let's hope that the better future includes a good education.
Well, Readers, I hope that you have received a better education than Kristof and all of the above people who make this job of mine so much fun.
