Tuesday, December 1, 2015

The Baker's Dozen

Dear Readers,

For the past forty-three months, I have been writing this blog in order to defend the English language.
I hope that you have enjoyed reading it and perhaps you have learned something from it.  As a kind of culmination, I offer to you a simple "test."  Below is a flyer I acquired and upon reading it, I found 13 errors (spelling, grammar and punctuation).  I challenge you to find all thirteen.  The answers are at the bottom of this page.  Good luck!









ANSWERS

Column 1
  1.  Balboa Blvd does not have a period at the end of the abbreviation.
  2.  All Regular Price Shoes - it should be "priced."

Column 2
  3.  The quote marks around the first paragraph are not necessary.
  4.  On the very first line, each word of the name of the store should be capitalized:  The Walking Shoe.
  5.  Continuing on the very first line, there should be a comma after the word Shoe.
  6.  In the second paragraph, there should be a comma after the word friendly.
  7.  Also in that paragraph, the word knowledgable is misspelled (correct:  knowledgeable).
  8.  In the third paragraph, the word specialize needs to be "specializes."
  9.  And in this paragraph, there should be a hyphen between wide and width.
 10. On the first line of the last paragraph, the word "If" should be lower case:  "if"
 11. The next word in this line, "your," needs to be "you're."
 12. Again in this paragraph, instead of a period after the word feet, there should be a comma.

Column 3
 13.  Toward the bottom of the list of shoe brands, Dr Scholls needs to have a period after the abbreviation Dr.


SCORING
13/13 = 100%
12/13 =   92
11/13 =   85
10/13 =   77
  9/13 =   69
  8/13 =   61
  7/13 =   54
  6/13 =   46
  5/13 =   38
  4/13 =   31
  3/13 =   23
  2/13 =   15
  1/13 =     8%


So, Readers, how did you do?   A+, B-, C?  If you received lower than an A, maybe you need to re-read all forty-three previous posts.  I thank you for letting me offer my expertise.

Monday, November 2, 2015

What the F*#@?

Dear Readers,

This month I will focus on more "Just Plain Wrong" (see blog March 2014).  Each time I see an egregious error, I am so shocked that I need to include it in this blog.

Example:  This came from a newspaper article about a Montebello mayor.  The headline read, "Mayor says she will remain in office"  and is followed by "Cortez thanks supporters one week after husband's arrest on drug charges."  Here are the egregious errors ...
The mayor is quoted, "I'd like to thank everyone for the tremendous support myself and my family has been receiving."  ...  "I will continue to do my job to the best of its ability."  *What the f*#@?
Who elected this woman to such a high office when she can't speak properly?

Example:  The book  Room 1219, written by Greg Merritt, tells the true story of Roscoe "Fatty" Arbuckle who was accused of killing his paramour Virginia Rappe in 1921.  There is eventually a trial and on one page the author refers to "opening arguments" and on another page he uses "closing statements."  *I checked on the United States Courts website (why didn't he?).  It is actually the opposite - opening statements and closing arguments.  I hear this all the time on the TV law-and-order-type shows.

Example:  Donna Tartt, in her novel "The Goldfinch,"  relates a short conversation between Goldie, a doorman, and Theo, a resident in a NYC apartment.  Theo says, "Hey, thanks for looking out for me..."  "No problemo," said Goldie.  Later on, Goldie talks about his home:  "I'm a tropical bird, you know?  I can't wait to go home to Puerto Rico."  *If he hails from Puerto Rico, where Spanish is the main language, why would he use "problemo" instead of the correct Spanish word "problema?"

Example:  On TV's "CBS Sunday Morning," there was a segment about September's fall TV lineup.
Correspondent Tracy Smith was talking to TV critic Alan Sepinwall who said, "Sunday night is the best and the worst because on the one hand, you have the very best shows in all of television, many of whom the very best shows in the history of television all airing on Sunday."  *What the f*#@?  Besides his very long run-on sentence, he referred to TV shows, as "whom."  The correct pronoun would be "which."  Also, he says the best and worst yet never mentions the worst.  Lastly, he says, "...on the one hand..." but never adds "on the other hand."  This is a critic and he gets paid for his opinions???  I wouldn't pay him one cent.

Example:  The premise of the now defunct TV show "Forever" was that Dr. Henry Morgan, English doctor and sleuth, has a strange affliction that renders him immortal, never aging beyond 36 years old.  He now lives in New York and helps detectives solve murders.  His story reveals that in the 1940's, he and his wife adopted an orphaned baby from a German concentration camp.  They named him Abraham.  Today, Abe is 70 years old but his "father" Henry remains 36 and together they own an antique store (besides Henry's vocation as medical examiner with the NYPD).  Here is the inconsistency that bothered me:  Abe was raised in New York by English parents who were not of the Jewish faith, yet Abe espouses these Yiddish expressions:  "Meh!"  "Fekakteh..."  "Mensch."  *From what I know about language, a child learns to speak from his parents, and although the accent may be more localized, expressions from another culture would not generally be adopted and used with such ease as Abe used them.  I assume that because the actor, Judd Hirsch, who plays Abe, is an older Jewish man, that the writers inadvertently wrote his lines to reflect this.  In my opinion, not Kosher at all.

Last example:  TV host Cat Deeley was interviewed in the TV Guide magazine.  She talked about being called by "American Idol" to possibly replace host Ryan Seacrest because he was sick.  She says, "At the very last minute, they're like, 'He's going on.'  No problem, that's totally cool.  And then they went, 'But we still want you to sit here behind the stage just in case he takes a turn for the worse.'"  *Over the years, I have heard new words and expressions creep into our vernacular, and this shows clearly how such unlikely synonyms for the word "said" have entered the English language.

Well, dear Readers, I hope you are as aghast as I am at some of these wacky errors.  They are actually fun to spot and write about.  I hope you enjoyed reading the posting.


Saturday, October 3, 2015

The Missing Link

Dear Readers,

In my blog posted May 2015,  I wrote about sentences with missing verbs.  This month I am going to focus on other examples of missing words, including verbs. Got time?  Read on...

Example:  In an episode of the now defunct TV show "Touch," a woman says to a gentleman guest arriving at her house for dinner, "Hey, didn't know you had a car."  *Where's the "I" in that statement?

Example:  Harvard educated street cop Jamie Reagan, on the TV show "Blue Bloods," was not happy with his partner's less than "by the book" tactics.  He tells his partner, "I come from a family of cops.  Good cops, great cops.  Proud of that."  He continues, "Now on, you make a move, you check with me first."   *He left out two words that I can see.  "I'm proud of that" and "From now on."  OK, he's a street cop, but he has a college education from Harvard.  He should speak better than that.

Example:  I saw this on a billboard asking, "IRS after you?"  *Again, two words are missing.  It should read, "Is the IRS after you?"

Example:  While watching "CSI:  Crime Scene Investigation," I came across two different instances where people left out words.  (1) Head investigator D.B. Russell comes into the office of lab rat Hodges and asks, "You text me?"  *Where's the "did" in that question?   (2) CSI Nick Stokes is questioning a man who has been living in an underground bunker.  Nick tells him he doesn't like the way the man treats trespassers.  Trying to find out if there is a link between this guy and a murdered camper, Nick asks, "Is that what happened with Carl Abrams?  He trespass?"  *Here again, the missing word is "did."  As a language investigator, I am curious to find these missing words.

I am quite aware that in spoken language, we often take shortcuts to save time.  I just thought I'd point out these obvious ones.  Okay with you?


Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Take the Direct (Object) Approach

Dear Readers,

If we look back, my April 2013 post, entitled "Me, Myself and I," focused on the incorrect usage of direct object pronouns as subject pronouns.  In this month's blog, I will focus on the incorrect usage of the subject pronoun as direct objects.  A direct object receives the action from the verb.
Example:  John loves Mary.  (John is the subject and Mary is the object.)
Just to refresh the memory, here are the correct pronouns:
            SUBJECT OF THE SENTENCE                             DIRECT OBJECT OF THE VERB
                       I                                                                             me
                       You                                                                        you
                       He, She                                                                 him, her
                       We                                                                         us
                       You (all)                                                                 you
                       They                                                                       them

Below you will see examples of how people are now using the subject pronoun for the direct object.


Example:  Steve Harvey had guest Judge Alex Ferrer on his show.  The Judge was talking about his background.  "My parents came from Cuba and brought my brothers and I."  *This is an educated man, a judge, speaking, and he used the wrong pronoun.  Of course it should be "my brothers and me."  I hope his judgments are better than his grammar.

Example:  In an episode of the TV show "Parenthood," Crosby tells his brother, "Jabbar asked Jasmine and I when we were getting married."  *This should be "Jabbar asked Jasmine and me..."
Jabbar is the subject but me is the object.

Example:  On the TV show "Vegas," Mr. Savino (owner of the Savoy Casino in Las Vegas) tells an employee, "The Mormon banker actually invited my wife and I to the country club."  *Again, it should be, "my wife and me" since they are the object of the verb invited.

Example:  I heard this on the sit-com "Anger Management."  Charlie, his ex-wife Jen and their daughter Sam are about to leave for Sam's softball game when Charlie says to Jen, "Can you give Sam and I a minute?"  *Not only is he using the subject pronoun in the object position, this is actually an indirect object rather than a direct object, but the pronouns for both are the same.  [In perfect English, one would say "give a minute to me and Sam."]  I am now guessing that TV writers are not taking grammar in school.  Such a shame.

This last example is my favorite because it shows how literate the author, Stephen King, is.
In his novel Under the Dome, an orphan, Alice, asks her caretaker Carolyn to bring her to the Town Hall meeting.  She asks, "Caro?  Will you take Aiden and I ... Aiden and me ... to the big meeting?"
*Thank you, Mr. King.  Reading your work is a pleasure.

Well, dear Readers, I hope you gain some insight as well as pleasure from reading my blog.

Saturday, August 1, 2015

To Have and Have Not

Dear Readers,
  Have you ever noticed that sometimes in speech or in print, the helping verb "have" has been either omitted or misspelled?  What do I mean by "helping verb?"  Let me give you examples:  When speaking in the past tense, we can either say, "They went to the movies," or "They have gone to the movies."  In the second example, have is the helping verb while gone is a past participle. Together they form a past tense.  See below for the correct helping verbs, depending on the subject.
                   I have spoken                        We have helped
                 You have eaten                 You all have seen
            He (she, or it) has been            They have arrived
Often, we contract the subject and helping verb like this:  I've spoken,  You've eaten, It's been ...
   The helping verb "have" is also used with expressions like:  I should have listened,  He would have seen,  You could have called,  They must have eaten.
When a contraction of these expressions is used, they look like this:
   I should've listened to you.    He would've seen us if he'd been on time.  You could've called me.  They must've eaten earlier.

   Sometimes these types of expressions are completely misspelled.  See below:
Example:  I saw this in a book by William Forstchen entitled "One Second After."
   "...it must of cost a fortune."  *I assume he meant to say "it must have cost a fortune" or "it must've cost a fortune."  What he wrote is just wrong.

Example:  In Janet Evanovich's novel "Two for the Dough," bounty hunter and heroine Stephanie Plum is talking to her friend Lula as they snoop around. Lula has broken the apartment window of someone that Stephanie is checking out.   Stephanie says, "I told you we weren't doing anything illegal.  People can't just go around breaking windows."  Lula replies, "Cagney would of done that."
Stephanie:  "Cagney would never have done that."  Lula:  Would of."  Stephanie:  "Would not!"
*Interesting that the author writes correctly what Stephanie says but not what Lula says.  I wonder why that is.

  Sometimes, the verb is just plain missing.
Example:  On an episode of TV's "Army Wives," Denise Sherwood, one of the wives, says to her future daugher-in-law, "How long you been seeing Dr. Hanson?"  *Specifically, "How long have you been seeing Dr. Hanson?"

   Other times, simply the wrong word is used.
Example:  Carl Hiassen wrote this bit in his novel "Sick Puppy."
  "The Governor of Florida is in his office when his phone rings and rings.  Apparently his secretary is not answering it.  He asks, "Is Dorothy gone home already?"  *Perhaps the fact that the Governor used to be a car salesman explains why he has such poor grammar.  Or maybe not.  Who knows?

   I do know, dear Readers, that when we say aloud expressions like "should've," "must've", "could've,"or "would've," it does sound like "should of," "must of," "could of," or "would of."  But of course, that doesn't make them right.  This posting should've explained it for you.

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

What or Which?

Dear Readers,

In the French language, one cannot use interchangeably the interrogatives "What...?" and "Which...?"
What? asks for either a definition or for an answer that is a direct object.  For example:  "What is a barracuda?  A fish or a mammal?"  and  "What are you eating?  I'm eating an apple."
Which is asked when there is a choice of answers.  For example:  "Which pair of shoes do you prefer?" and "Which is the correct answer, A or B?"
I find it interesting that in the English language people often do use these terms interchangeably.
See the examples below and try to imagine the word Which being used instead of What.

Example:  In an old "Seinfeld" episode, George is working on a project for the Mets that he is clueless about.  He is told to go down to the payroll office where he tells the clerk, "I'm working on the project."  The clerk asks, "What project?"

Example:  During an episode of "Hawaii 5-0," Commander Steve McGarrett has an investigator tailing his mother who walks into a grocery store.  She confronts the P.I. and asks, "Were you gonna ask my help in deciding what cantaloupes are ripe?"

Example:  Detective Danny Reagan on TV's "Blue Bloods," wants to protect a young woman that he has arrested and asks that she be transferred to protective custody. He's told that she's in the hospital.  He inquires, "What hospital?"

Example:  On the TV show "The Following," two followers of the serial killer Joe Carroll are discussing Emma, a third follower.  One guy says to the other, "I don't get the Emma you get."  Emma walks in on their conversations and asks, "What Emma is that?"

Example:  Songwriting duo Gunnar and Scarlette, on the TV show "Nashville," are told by their manager that they have officially received an offer to put one of their songs on hold.  Gunnar asks, "What song?"

Example:  In the novel Curse of the Spellmans by Lisa Lutz, Private Investigator Isabel Spellman is asked by her teen-aged sister Rae, "So is it all right if I go over to my friend's house?"  Isabel asks,
"What friend?"

Now read one example of the better word being used:

On an episode of BBC America's show "Copper," former Union army major and current New York businessman Robert Morehouse is at a meeting with some cronies.  He says, "Shall we take a recess from business?  The neighborhood is afire with whispers of last month's scandal."  One of the men asks, "Christ, which scandal?"  *Ah, leave it to the British to speak good English.

So, dear Readers, which blog will you refer to when faced with the What/Which dilemma?
I hope it's mine.

Monday, June 1, 2015

Neither this nor that

Dear Readers,
 I am going to start this post with a cute exchange between Dr. Sheldon Cooper and his casual girlfriend, Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler, from an episode of "The Big Bang Theory."  Sheldon has become jealous when she goes out with another fellow.  He proposes this scenario to her:  "With the understanding that nothing changes whatsoever, physical or otherwise, I would not object to us no longer characterizing you as 'not my girlfriend.'"  She replies, "Interesting...Now try it without the quadruple negative."  She is obviously bright enough, having a doctorate of science, to catch those pesky negatives.  What I am going to focus on this month is the actual need for two negatives.
When one uses the conjunction "neither," it should be followed by its corresponding negative "nor," not "or."  See below for examples of right and wrong.

WRONG
Example:  In the July 16, 2012 edition of People magazine, there was an article about Katie Holmes' split from Tom Cruise.  "Neither Nicole [Kidman, Cruise's second wife] or Katie embraced Scientology," says one source.

Example:  Le Mariage by Diane Johnson has a character musing about a missing member of her community.  She says, "Neither SuAnn or Cristal are one hundred percent, in my opinion."  *Not only does the author not use the correct nor, she also uses a plural verb "are" when it should be singular, "is."

CORRECT
Example:  Geena Davis' character, Dr. Lindqvist, on the TV movie "Coma," says this when a resident doctor barges into an Ethics Committee meeting:  "This is neither the time nor the place."

Examples from 50 Shades Freed by E.L. James:  (1) Narrator Anastasia Steele is reluctant to talk about where her honeymoon will take place.  She says, "Neither Mia nor Kate has managed to inveigle the information out of him [referring to her fiance, Christian]."
(2)  As Anastasia, her maid of honor Kate, and her mother discuss the lack of the word "obey" in the wedding vows, Ana's thoughts are, "Neither she nor my mother have any idea of the fight Christian and I had about that."

Example:  The BBC America TV show "Copper" takes place in New York around the time after the civil war.  In one episode, detective Kevin Corcoran is searching for his missing friend and colleague.  He goes to the parish priest for help.  The priest says, "I have neither seen nor heard from Francis Maguire," much to Kevin's consternation.

Example:  Philippa Gregory's novel The White Queen takes place in 1471 England.  King Edward York tells his wife about his enemy:  "Warwick is holed up in Coventry and will neither surrender nor give battle."
*In these last two examples, I am pleased to see that the modern writers chose to have their characters speak proper English.  We should all strive to speak as well.  But the point is neither here nor there.  It's up to you.



Saturday, May 2, 2015

Where's the verb?

Dear Readers,
  I have been noticing this trend for a very long time and this month I will share it with you.
In speech and in writing, people are leaving out the verb and/or other words in a sentence or a question.  No doubt we understand perfectly, but to me, it just seems lazy.  Does it really take that long to say, "Are" in the question?
   Although nearly all the references from TV shows are from programs that are now off the air, the examples are still valid.  See below:

Example:  In an episode of the sitcom "Hot in Cleveland," Courtney's boyfriend is on crutches.  She asks him, "You okay?"

Example:  Hannah, the wife of Detective Michael Britten on the TV show "Awake," asks him, "You all right?"

Example:  On the show "Fairly Legal," Kate Reed, a mediator for a law firm, is questioning a witness on a case involving a fishing boat accident.  She asks, "How long you at sea?"

Example:  In the novel Angel Falls by Kristin Hannah, young Bret is playing a game with his grandmother who asks Bret's father Liam if he'd like to join them.  When the dad declines, Bret asks, 'You sure, Dad?"  The dad answers, "I'm sure, buddy."  *Note that the father's sentence did have the verb included (I am = I'm).

In the following examples, you will see a word or two missing.  I have no doubt that you can figure out what those words are.

Example:  Broadway diva Veronica Moore, in an episode of "Smash," will be playing the lead in the musical "The Wiz."  Her director, Derek Wills, is looking at sketches for possible costumes.  She asks him, "Which one you like?"

Example:  On "CSI:  NY,"  Detectives Mac Taylor and Don Flack are chasing a perp.  When Mac reaches the man first, Don asks, "You run track or something?  You on the Olympic team?"

Example:   In an episode of "Scandal,"  Olivia Pope, the infamous Washington, D.C. fixer on the show, has been kidnapped.  Her staff, Huck and Quinn, hold down the fort at her office.  When lobbyist Elizabeth North enters, Quinn asks, "Help you with something?"

Example:  Dan Brown, author of Deception Point, has an oceanographer ask a colleague:  "Corky, there any chance the meteorite we pulled out of that hole had living organisms on it?"

Example:   On a billboard advertising for the San Diego Zoo -
             Kids Free in October

Example:  On another billboard -
              IRS after you?

So, dear Readers,  got grammar?

   
 



Friday, April 3, 2015

None But The Brave

Dear Readers,

Here is a quiz for you.  Pick the best answer.
        None of us  ____ perfect.
              A.  are
              B.  is
Searching in the Random House Dictionary, I found that "none" is defined as:  no one, not one.   None of the members is going.
According to my best friends Strunk and White, "With none, use the singular verb when the word means 'no one' or 'not one.'"  If you substitute "Not one" for "none," you can see that the answer is B.
But people tend to only hear the plural end of that phrase and therefore use a plural verb.
Read below for examples of incorrect usage of the verb.

Example:  In a People magazine interview with reality star Katie Hopkins, she says, "None of our lives are perfect."

Example:  Deborah Feldman, author of Unorthodox, writes, "None of the others seem to notice how I feel about them."  And her husband says, "None of my brothers are entrepreneurs or businessmen."

Example:  On Steve Harvey's daytime talk show, one of his guests is a woman who lost a dramatic amount of weight.  She recounts her overweight father saying, "Look at us.  None of us are healthy, we will all die young."

Example:  When a murder takes place during a Mars planetary simulation on the show "Castle," author Rick Castle and NYPD detective Kate Beckett interrogate three key players.  Beckett tells them, "The bad news is, none of you are going to Mars."

Example:  Sherlock Holmes, in an episode of TV's "Elementary," explains to his protege that when he returned to London a year ago, he had certain expectations and that "none of them were met."

Example:  On "Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce," newly single author Abby McCarthy is given an assignment to date ten men in two days.  After she does, she returns for a tryst with a younger man she had met previously.  She confides to him, "None of them were you."

Example:  Annalise Keating is a defense attorney and mentor to a group of law students in the TV show "How To Get Away With Murder."  In one episode, she asks these students to find out if a young woman committed murder.  She tells them, "And right now, none of you have convinced me that Rebecca did this."

Example:  Even the aristocrats use the wrong verb.  I heard this on "Downton Abbey" when the Dowager Lady Grantham and Mrs. Crawley discuss going to a tea for Russian expatriates.  The older woman says she doesn't have the energy to attend.  Mrs. Crawley counters with, "But you must come.  You've been to Russia.  None of us have."

Now here are a few examples of the correct singular verb being used.

Example:  This I heard during a radio interview about a kidnapped and killed young woman.
"I don't know how she died.  None of us knows."

Example:  In a People magazine article on besmirched newsman Brian Williams and his changing versions of his experiences in Iraq, the magazine states, "None of the versions was true."

Example:  Daniel James Brown, in his book The Boys in the Boat, he describes the brand new shell houses built in Berlin for the 1936 Olympic games.  "Not one of these was anything like the shell houses Joe and his crewmates had known."  *Note here that he even used the longer expression "Not one" instead of "none."  This makes it crystal clear that the verb needs to be in the singular.

Example:  In an episode of "CSI," a promotional magnet from a pizza parlor is found at a classic car collection where a murder was committed.  The employees of the pizza parlor are questioned.  The investigator who interrogated them tells his boss, "None of them has a record,... and none of them collects cars."  *With good grammar like that, it's no wonder that they solved the crime.


Well, Readers,  none of us is perfect and all of us make mistakes on occasion, including me.  But at least now we know the correct form of the verb to use after the word "none," and maybe we will help solve a murder.

Sunday, March 1, 2015

Wrong Word

Dear Readers,
  As you are aware, I often come across the wrong word used either in speech or in writing. Keep reading to see some of the newest ones I have come across.

Example:  In the TV show "Motive," Detectives Flynn and Vega are working to solve a murder.  In the Vancouver P.D. office, their colleague Lucas says to them, "So it occurred to me that we need to re-review the phone records."  *According to the Random House Dictionary, review already means "the process of going over a subject again ..."  His redundancy is redundant.

Example:  During Steve Harvey's daytime talk show, a young man tells Steve about his experience of starting college while living in his car.  Steve asks him why he didn't ask for help.  Colin explains that his parents were going through a divorce at the time and, "it wasn't the most harmonous situation."
*I believe the word he wanted to use was harmonious.  It's clear that going to college while living in a car is an impediment to a good education.

Example:  Daniel James Brown wrote a powerful book entitled The Boys in the Boat.  Generally it was very well written except for a couple of errors.
1.  Brown uses one of my pet peeves that I have already written about [March 2013]:  "That was a whole nother ball of wax." *There is no such word as "nother."
2.  Here he writes, "As many as a hundred thousand people had been expected for the regatta but by midafternoon only perhaps a third of that number had showed up."  *The past participle of the verb "show" is "shown."   If you read his aloud, it sounds like you have a cold.

Example:  On the TV show "Modern Family," Gloria's sister Sonia is visiting from Colombia during the Valentine's weekend and decides to cook dinner for Gloria and her husband Jay.  Jay feels bad so he offers to Sonia the gift he originally bought for his French bulldog, Stella - a necklace with a letter "S" charm.  Sonia is so touched she gives Jay a huge hug.  He turns to the camera and says, "When will I learn?  I'm catnip to sister-in-laws."  *When will the writers learn to check spelling on -in-law plurals.  It's always "sisters-in-law," "brothers-in-law," and "mothers-in-law."

Since I watch and read a lot of crime stories, I often come across the expressions blood spatter and blood splatter.  Which is correct?  According to Grammarist.com, to spatter is to scatter or dash (liquid) in small drops.  The small drops are key.  For example, a light rain might spatter the roof.
Splatter, which came later and was probably formed by blending splash and spatter, has a similar meaning, but it doesn't necessarily involve small drops.  A splatter of liquid might be large and messy.   Think of spatter as a synonym of sprinkle or spit, and splatter as closer to splash.  Still, this conventional distinction notwithstanding, the words are often used interchangeably.  See the following examples:

Example:  One of my favorite TV shows, now off the air, is "Dexter," who is the blood spatter expert for the Miami-Dade police department.  However, in a TV Guide article on the series, it describes him as "the Miami Police Department's blood-splatter expert."

Example:  On TV's "Mike and Molly," when police officer Mike's partner Carl notices the drippings of a chili dog on Mike's uniform, Carl says, "I've seen triple homicides with less splatter."  *Since splatter indicates more of a splashing than a sprinkling, that must have been some chili dog, right?

Example:  On the show "Forever," NYPD detective Jo Martinez brings her medical examiner Dr. Henry Morgan to the scene of a murder.  She says, "No weapons were found, blood splatter was irregular.."  But in another episode, M.E. Dr. Morgan tells a different police inspector, "Look, see the way the blood spatter landed?" *Come on, writers, please make up your mind.

Example:  In two different episodes of TV's "CSI:  Crime Scene Investigation," I heard this:
1. A murder victim was killed in a billiards hall.  While checking it out, CSI Sara Sidle says, "Blood spatter on the table says that this is almost certainly the primary [location]."
2.  CSI's Stokes and Brody are inspecting a convertible car in which sits their latest victim.  Brody points out, "Cast-off and spatter indicate he was killed in the car."  *At least the writers on this show are consistent.

Example:  In C.J. Box's novel Trophy Hunt, he describes the scene of a crime:  "The rock was granite ... It was green except for the spatter of dark blood on its surface."

Example:  Also found in Daniel James Brown's The Boys in the Boat, he writes these two descriptions.
1.  "Light rain head been spattering on the boys' straw hats ..." as the 1936 crew team waited at the opening of the Olympic Games in Berlin.
2.  As the crew members entered the Olympic stadium, he writes, "For the most part, the crowd applauded politely.  Mixed in with the applause, though, was a spattering of whistles and the stomping of feet, the European equivalent of catcalls and boos."   *I'm not sure that spattering is the correct word here since it doesn't deal with liquid.  I think he might have meant to use the word "smattering," which means slight or superficial.  What do you think?


I heard Dennis Prager on KRLA radio explain the misuse and correct use of these two expressions:  heart-rending and gut-wrenching.  Heart-rending is defined by the Random House Dictionary as:  causing or expressing intense grief, anguish or distress.  Gut-wrenching, as defined by Merriam-Webster Dictionary, means causing mental or emotional anguish.  Although the definitions are quite similar, the words cannot be interchanged, as in the examples below.

Example:  People magazine, in an article from the January 2015 issue, wrote about a murder that took place in 1985.  "In the 29 years since that heart-wrenching call ..."

Example:  In the novel The Oath by John Lescroart, Brendan Driscoll, an assistant to recently deceased Tim Markham, has been let go by the company.  "The no doubt heart-wrenching departure scene with Driscoll ..." *These first two examples should have read "heart-rending" OR "gut-wrenching," but not a mixture of both.

In these next examples, the correct expression has been used.

Example:  Tracy Smith, of the news show "CBS Sunday Morning," interviewed Charles Spencer, brother of the late Princess Diana.  They discuss the eulogy he gave at his sister's funeral.  Tracy tells us, "Charles said it took him only 90 minutes to scrawl out his heart-rending speech."

Example:  C.J. Box, in his novel Trophy Hunt, writes, "Marie gasped, seemed to hold her breath, then let out a gut-wrenching wail ..."

Example:  I read an article on Brooke Shields's autobiography in another People magazine.  The article quotes her when she had to put her mother, Teri, into an assisted living facility. She writes, "All my frustrations, fear and worry and what little anger I really and rarely possessed melted in abject, gut-wrenching and profound sadness."

 On the lighter side, check out the use of the wrong word in the title of the sequel to the movie "Dumb and Dumber." -  "Dumb and Dumber To."  I laughed so hard, and it obviously achieved exactly what it set out to do.

So, Readers, it may not be heart-rending nor gut-wrenching to see or hear these mistakes, but it does make me take notice, and now you can, too.



Sunday, February 1, 2015

Try, try again

Dear Readers,
   Here is a little test for you.  Pick the correct answer.
      A.  I am going to try and call you tonight.
      B.  I am going to try to call you tonight.
      C.  Both A and B

  The correct answer is C.  According to Strunk and White's Elements of Style, "try takes the infinitive:  'try to mend it,' not 'try and mend it.'  Students of the language will argue that try and has won through and become idiom.  Indeed it has, and it is relaxed and acceptable.  But try to is precise, and when you are writing formal prose, try and write try to."
   I have been noticing this trend for a while.  In the French language, the verb try must be followed by the infinitive form of the verb.  [The infinitive is the form of the verb introduced by the word "to," not having a subject used with it.  Examples:  to eat, to sleep, to dream]  Let's compare this verb to the verb "hope."  We might say, "I hope and pray that you get better."  Since hope and pray in this sentence reflect simultaneous actions, the word in between, and, is correct.  But when we say,"I am  going to try and call you," they are not simultaneous.  The second action (call) is dependent on the first action (try), which is why it should read, "I will try to call you."  Alas, the word "and" has supplanted the word "to" in the English language, much to my chagrin.  Here are examples of both ways.

TRY AND...
Example:  In the novel The Oath by John Lescroart, defense attorney Dismas Hardy says to his client, "I  want you to try and remember if you met someone in your building."

Example:  Sue Monk Kidd, in her novel The Invention of Wings, writes about abolitionist and women's rights crusader Sarah Grimke who takes a stand by sitting in church with the Negro women.  Her friend explains to her, "Try and understand, Sarah, we looked the other way while you sat on the Negro pew."

Example: When I read Unintended Consequences by Stuart Woods, I noticed this:  "Try and keep Marcel alive until then."

Example:  In The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt,  her young protagonist says , "I began to walk east again, pausing every now and then to try and hail a cab."

Example:  "The Next Three Days" (movie released in 2010) shows a scene where a man and his young son are at the park and are invited to a little girl's birthday party.  The father says to the girl's mother, "Thank you very much for the invitation.  We'll try and make it."

Example:  Steve Coogan, in the film "The Trip," has asked his friend Rob Brydon to accompany him on a working trip to the north of England.  When they arrive at their first hotel and there is only one room booked, Steve calls his assistant "to try and sort this out."

Example:  On an episode of "Downton Abbey," Lord Merton is having tea with the Dowager Countess and Isobel Crawley.  Mr. Merton commends Isobel's late husband as being a nobleman and a doctor and laments that his own father would not have approved.  Isobel says, "I must try and find an example to rebut that."  *Even the stuffy English back in the 1920's said it wrong.  Or rather the writers of 2014 did.

TRY TO ...
Example:  C.J. Box, in his novel Winter Kill, writes, "Grabbing his coat from the rack in the mud room, he went outside into the dark to try to clear his mind."

Example:  In a People magazine article on Diem Brown (MTV reality star who recently passed away from cancer), her close friend Julie recalls a time right before her death: "We tried to laugh and tell stories..."

Example:  On TV's "Red Band Society," a small group of teens lives at the hospital where they are being treated.  A new patient arrives and leads them on a mysterious outing.  Going through a doorway at the hospital, he whispers, "Try to stay quiet."

Example:  Seattle weather girl Sylvia Miller, in the titular movie "Weather Girl," has an on-air breakdown.  She starts ranting, "Day after day as I stood in front of this stupid map repeatedly trying to find new adjectives to describe the word rain,..."

Example:  In the 2004 film "The Terminal," Viktor Navorski is stuck in the JFK airport until his visa clears.  While there, he befriends a young food service worker who is attracted to a pretty immigration officer.  He enlists Viktor's help to get to know her better.  After Viktor talks to her, the young man says, "Try to repeat exactly what she said."

  Well, Readers, I have tried to give examples of both ways of using this expression.  I implore you to try to use it correctly.
 

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Punctuation: necessary or not?

Dear Readers,

   In a 1993 episode of "Seinfeld," Elaine is upset because a seemingly perfect new boyfriend took down an urgent phone message and didn't add an exclamation point.  They argue about its importance and he walks out.  Later, when she tells Jerry what happened, he says, "I never heard of a relationship being affected by punctuation."
  Well, my relationship with the books and articles I read is sometimes affected by punctuation.  I can get so exasperated that I have to blog about it.  Read on.

Example:  John Grisham writes in his novel The Last Juror, "Sirens approached, then more shots, more shouting.  What in the world!"
 He also writes, "Willie!  You okay!"   *I believe these are questions being asked and therefore a question mark is needed instead of an exclamation point.  Am I right?

Example:  In The Guy Not Taken by Jennifer Weiner, when main character Marlie sees that an ex-boyfriend and his fiancee have requested a digital food scale on their wedding registry, she wonders,
"And if you're the person who gives them the food scale, what do you say on the card?  'Best wishes for a happy life together, PS, don't get fat?'"  *First, there should be a period after the word together.
Then there should either be a colon after PS:  or periods in between the letters [P.S.].
P.S.  Should the question mark come after the word fat?   This all just looks wrong.

Author Donna Tartt seems to like to write without commas.  Check out these examples from her novel The Goldfinch.
Example: "Well done you!"
Example:  "Yes yes, fine."
 *Where are the editors, I ask?

On TV's "The Big Bang Theory," someone is pulling a Halloween prank on Dr. Sheldon Cooper in his office at Cal Tech.  Blood dripping on the wall spells out:  SEE YOU IN HELL SHELDON
His reaction is, "The most frightening thing about that is the missing comma."  *Yes, Sheldon, I completely agree.

I like this example:  In an episode of TV's "The Middle," the town of Orson, Indiana is turning 100.
In honor of the Orsontennial, young Brick Heck enters a contest for a new city motto.  His is not chosen.  The winner is, "Orson - why not?"  He exclaims, "Nobody said we could use punctuation."

Have you ever heard the terms "under-punctuation" and "over-punctuation"?  Probably not.  That's because I just made them up.  I was given lots of data from the book entitled Over Age Dating written by Kathy Lerner.  The book doles out dating advice from 80-year old Aunt Frieda.  Check out these examples from this book.

Example:  Describing how to look hot at 80 years old:  I've been botoxed, bleached, tinted and threaded.  My former tightly curled gray hair is now blonde-streaked and has undergone a "Brazilian Blowout,"   *There is no need for both italics and "quote marks." Over-punctuation.  Not to mention the comma came at the end of the sentence.  Where's the period?

Example:  Describing current trends:  Get a "TRAMP STAMP" [tattoo].  *Does this need  to be CAPITALIZED and "quoted"?  Over- punctuation.  One or the other would have been sufficient.

Example:  She goes on:  Remember - no matter what your shape, it'll look better shoved into something tight and glittery..  *Was this supposed to be an elipsis (...) or was an extra period put in to make up for the missing one above?

Example:  The "Now" Generation:  You no longer dance Arthur Murray style - You dance Gangham, girl!!!  You are on a constant quest for the Fountain of Groovy . . . .  *First, she misspelled
Gangnam [Korean style of dance - I checked].  Next, she used three exclamation points!!!  Then she used italics and bold followed by four dots.  An elipsis uses only three.  Once again,
"over-punctuated!!"

Example:  On pet names for the new man in your life:  Call him "Dr. Fondles,"  Mr. Cuddles, or "You rascal you!!"  *Did you notice that the first and third pet names are quoted but the second one is not?(Here is a case for under-punctuation.)  And on the third, she uses both italics and quote marks plus two exclamation points.  What point is she really trying to make?  Over-punctuation???

Example:  For after the dirty deed:  Don't have that dreaded "morning after debriefing, "your bedroom is not "Operation Pacific" or "The Sands of Iwo Jima."   * Did you notice that the end quote did not come at the end of the phrase "morning after debriefing" but came before the next word.
And of course, too much punctuation with quote marks and italics.  This lady is desperately trying to get her points across, but she does it so poorly.  That's just my opinion.  DO YOU AGREE???

To really express how important punctuation is, read below two letters punctuated differently.  Which  one you would prefer to receive?


Dear John: 
I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be? 
Yours, 
Jane

Dear John: 
I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be yours? 
Jane

   In conclusion, dear Readers, I believe that punctuation is important, and that good punctuation is necessary.  I hope you agree.