The Good, the Bad, and the Sick Puppy

Dear Readers,
   Usually I quote from many sources, but this month I am going to break from tradition and take my findings from one source only.  I recently finished reading Carl Hiaasen's novel Sick Puppy.  It was so gloriously full of correct and incorrect examples that I decided to dedicate this posting to it alone. 

WRONG PUNCTUATION
   In this story, environmentalist hero Twilly Spree is trying to protect an island off the coast of Florida.  He comes up against much opposition.  Here's an exchange between the governor and his assistant:  The governor says, "Don't tell me there's goddamn bald eagles on this island, because that means we got a federal scenario."  His assistant replies, "They're doing the survey this week."
The governor adds, "Who."  *A question was being asked here yet a period is used instead of a question mark.  Bad.

   When the governor of Florida asks a state trooper to find a person of interest and the trooper says that he can't really help, the governor comes back with, "Is that so."  *Again, a question was being asked but there is no question mark.  Bad.

   Mr. Hiaasen is talking about the former governor of Florida when he writes, "Jesus, Clinton Tyree thought, who am I kidding here."  *Another question without a question mark.  What gives?  Bad.

MISSING WORD
   After spending the night with Desie Stoat, the wife of a Florida lobbyist, our hero Twilly Spree gets up to go for a walk.  Desie asks, "Where you going?"  *I know that sometimes authors write how normal people speak, but it irks me that the word are is missing.  Bad.  At least there was a question mark at the end of that question.  Good.

   A hired hit man weighs in with these thoughts:  "The hell's that supposed to mean?"   And, "The fuck are you staring at?"   *Where is the what  in both of those questions?  OK, it's hit man speak, but I still consider it Bad.  Did you notice the question marks?  Good.

WRONG WORD
    Engineer Karl Krimmler, clearing land on the above-mentioned endangered island, is told to take some time off because there's a small problem.  Krimmler asks, "What kind a problem?  What in the hell kind a problem could shut down the whole job?"   *Shouldn't it be "kind of problem?"  Of course it should.  Bad.

   Desie's large Labrador has sunk his teeth into her boyfriend's neck.  "But the more strenuously Desie tried to prize open the dog's jaws, the more intractable his grip became."  *I looked up the word "prize" in the dictionary.  This is the description:  prize   verb:  1.  Chiefly Brit. Dial.  pry.
So why not say "pry" instead of "prize" since Hiaasen is from Florida, not England.  Bad.

    Florida lobbyist Palmer Stoat nodded conspiratorially to one of his clients.  "They'll be some money floating around next week."  *This one is really Bad.  Of course it should be "There will be..."

    Lobbyist Stoat is doing business with Robert Clapley, a builder who needs his help.  When the payment is due, Clapley is hoping for a break on the hefty $50,000 fee, but Stoat wants it all.
"Palmer Stoat enjoyed watching the man write out the check.  Clapley's discomfiture was manifest, and Stoat didn't mind prolonging it."  *The dictionary defines "discomfiture" this way:  noun:           1. defeat in battle; 2. frustration of hopes or plans.  Perhaps Hiaasen was using definition #2, but I believe he really meant "discomfort," defined in the dictionary as, noun:  1. an absence of comfort or ease; uneasiness, hardship or mild pain.  Bad.  Note the next example.

   When the governor of Florida asks a state trooper for help with a delicate situation, "the trooper's expression never changed, but the governor sensed an onset of discomfort, a newfound wariness in the man's gaze."  *Here Hiaasen is using the correct noun.  Wouldn't that be the same one he should have used in the above paragraph?  Good.

UNUSUAL WORDS
    The Florida governor's assistant has ambition to further her career in politics, possibly as a lobbyist, even though they are not the most ethical group of people.  ". . . and they were (Lisa June was the first to admit) a mostly purulent lot."  *purulent:   adjective:  1. full of, containing, forming or discharging pus.  **I suppose that is an apt description.  Good.

   The Florida lobbyist is watching two hookers cavorting in a hot tub.  "Their sodden, matted hair looked like clumps of blond sargassum. . ."  *sargassum:  noun:  any seaweed of the genus Sargassum, widely distributed in the warmer waters of the globe.  **I had never heard that word before, but since Hiaasen lives in Florida, he would be aware of this type of seaweed.  Good.

  "Clinton Tyree laughed mordantly. . ."  *mordantly:  adverb:  sarcastically, wittily, caustically.

   "In the tumult Clinton Tyree had lost his shower cap and his refulgent bullet-headed baldness further enhanced the aura of menace."  *refulgent:  adjective:  shining, radiant, glowing.  Good use of vocabulary in both examples.

   In conclusion, I offer my apologies to Mr. Hiaasen for pointing the finger so often.  However, that did not preclude me from enjoying the story.  He does write with a great sense of humor.  Perhaps I have piqued your interest and you will now want to read the book. 
  
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